Again, the most common causes of fighting were disputes over some aspect of the game being played Age and sex differences are reported in some measures across all three studies.
In my opinion, the most effective way to handle news about fighting at school is to do the following:. When your child gets home, give him ten minutes to reorient to the house. Let him have his snack or listen to some music.
The time to talk about any episode is not right when he gets home. Rather, the time to talk about it is ten minutes later, after your child has calmed down. When you talk, try to avoid blaming, tricking or trapping your child. Instead, be very direct and straightforward; put the facts out there. Would you like to tell me what happened? By the way, these misperceptions will need to be corrected. So encourage your child to talk.
Can you tell me what happened? If he decides to talk, let him tell you as much as he can. Our goal is to investigate and learn information. Is that right? And then the teacher told you to go to the lunch counter, and said that he would take care of Michael for you. Instead, you chose to curse at Michael and started walking toward him in a threatening way. What were you trying to accomplish when you cursed at Michael and walked in his direction?
Most importantly, you want your child to make an admission about what happened so he can learn from it. So I understand. I think you should follow your policy.
Any functional problem—running in the hall, chewing gum, throwing something—should be handled by the school. The reason you have to challenge the more disruptive behaviors at home is because home is the place where you have the time to teach him about alternatives. On the other hand, if this is the second time this has happened at school, not only should you talk about where his skills broke down, but there should be a consequence to keep him accountable.
That consequence could include any task that you think would be helpful to his learning about the situation for the amount of time it takes him to complete it.
So grounding him for six hours is not helpful, but having him write ten things he could do differently next time is helpful. That timeline is easy; the school has already set it for you. Remember, if your child is suspended to home, then you put the keyboard, the cable box, and the phone in the back of your car when you go to work. Remember, if two kids with distorted perceptions get into a physical fight, there may not be a truth; there might just be their distorted perceptions compounded by the absence of communication and problem-solving skills.
Since hitting a pressure point can take out your opponent, aim for their groin or the area between their navel and groin. Did this summary help you? Yes No. Log in Social login does not work in incognito and private browsers. Please log in with your username or email to continue. No account yet? Create an account. Edit this Article. We use cookies to make wikiHow great. By using our site, you agree to our cookie policy. Cookie Settings. Learn why people trust wikiHow. Download Article Explore this Article methods.
Tips and Warnings. Related Articles. Article Summary. Method 1. All rights reserved. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc. Pay attention to know when a fight is coming. You usually have warning when someone is about to start a fight. They may be throwing insults at you, acting aggressively, and getting in your space. These are all signs a fight may be coming.
If you're prepared, you'll be more likely to win the fight or at least come out of it with less harm. Start in a defensive position with a prayer-like stance. Don't put your fists up like you're ready to fight. Instead, put your hands in front of you with your palms together. Keep your elbows low and against your sides and spread your feet shoulder-width apart with your dominant foot slightly in front. In this position, you're ready to defend vital parts of your body. Aim to get a blow in as early as possible.
Even though you don't want to throw the first punch, you do need to get a hit in early. That's because fights rarely last more than a few seconds, so if you can take them out early, you're more likely to win. If you someone coming at you, try to deflect the blow and then do what it takes to slow the person down.
Alternatively, go for a punch at the chin, nose, or forehead. Keep your fist straight; otherwise, your wrist may break when you deliver a hard punch. Another option is claw at the person's face, as it will often shock them enough to slow down. Get at the person with your knees and elbows.
You're just trying to get the person to stop fighting you, so use what you can. Elbow them in the stomach if you need to or knee them in the leg or groin.
Keep using your knees and elbows to attack the person so they stop attacking you. Seize the chance if you and your opponent are twisted to the side. Punch them in the side of the head. You could also push their head down and swing them to the ground. Move forward toward the person as you punch.
If you keep moving back, that shows a defensive position, and you want to go on the offensive. Keep going at them until they admit defeat or go down to the ground. Pin your opponent to the ground when possible. If they fall, seize the chance to keep them there. Sit on top of them if they want to keep fighting.
Hold them down until they surrender, someone comes to help, or they're too weak to fight anymore. Once a person goes down, stop hitting them. You could seriously injure them. I sent the boy to the hallway to wait while I calmed my class. In the hallway, the boy revealed to me his father was physically abusive.
The trauma from that incident had spilled over into the morning, and the boy physically was not capable of regulating his emotions. He made a public apology to the student and was punished with community service. More importantly, we were able to get him and his mom in family therapy and anger management. Moments like these are dangerous and potentially explosive, but educators have the unique and challenging opportunity to help curb violence in classrooms.
When we approach school fights with careful strategy, kindness and empathy, we can get at the root of the problem and begin to crack the code on bullying while protecting and helping as many students as we can.
If you see two students approaching each other in an aggressive way, verbally shock them out of their mindset. One way to do this is through humor. Humor is usually more effective in tense pre-fight situations than becoming angry and stressed.
Verbal commands are more effective before the fight begins. Remind them in a forceful way what is going to happen to them if they start to fight.
For example, you can say:.
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